A little known fact about me: I'm a sucker for terrible movies...and terrible television. I'm not really sure why, but I am sucked in by the worst kinds of shows and movies. No, I do not mean reality TV, that is just stupid. I mean those movies they play on the weekends just to fill time, and the television shows that you secretly watch but never want to tell anyone about. (Even though I do). As I contemplated what I was going to talk about for Christmas, I decided that I would just talk about my favorite thing to do during the holiday...and that is watch horrible movies. But, I'm going one step further. Since I am technically a writer, I guess I'll just create a little Christmas magic for you. Enjoy. If my life were a Christmas movie/musical.....
1) Everyone would love Christmas...except an old man...or a woman with some secret reason for hating the holiday.
This is a beautiful thing about Christmas movies. Everyone loves the holiday, save for a couple of people. If my life were a Christmas movie, I would spend all day listening to carols and drinking hot cocoa. By the fire, of course. I love Christmas, and one of my favorite things about the holiday is the music. I would probably listen to it all year if it was socially acceptable. I know quite a few people (insert old man and woman) that loath Christmas music, but I've just decided that they are sad, sad individuals. Usually, they are just lonely, and if my life were a movie, I would spend the entire two hour spot trying to spread the Christmas cheer, only to discover that they just want to be invited for Christmas supper. What an easy fix!
2) I would fall in love in 5-10 minutes.
It's true, I would. If I were in a movie, I would be ice skating (on a perfect rink, mind you) or grocery shopping. Somehow, even though I am a skilled ice skater and/or grocery cart driver, I would run into some random guy. When we finally righted ourselves, we would gaze into each others eyes and BAM! Love. Right there. In the middle of the taco shell aisle. (Or ice rink as the Zamboni drives by). If my life were a Christmas musical, we would spend the next 5 minutes singing a duet called, "I never thought I'd find love at a super market (or ice skating rink)." It would be an instant hit, and we would make millions on the download profits. IF ONLY. But, sadly, dream man and I would break up 30 minutes later because a former boyfriend of mine decides to profess his love or I find out he has a kid (that isn't his, but I assume and you know what that does...). Oh, the horror!
3) My family would be crazy.
Wait...didn't I say this was fictional? But really, I would have a completely neurotic family that controlled my life, and I would spend the entire movie (up until the last 10 minutes) wishing that I could somehow escape them. I would sing a power ballad, and the camera would fade away from me sitting on my daybed holding a stuffed unicorn. Eventually, I would realize that my family is what I need and they really aren't as bad as I thought they were. Which leads me to the climax of the movie...
4) I realize that the true meaning of Christmas is love.
Yes, love. Love for your family. Love for Christmas. Love for that random guy you met in the supermarket (or ice skating). I would realize that my family loves me, random guy and I would fix our problems, and he would have Christmas dinner with my family. (Because his is conveniently absent, of course). If my life were a Christmas movie, all of these things would come to me in the final minutes of the movie, and we would all live happily ever after.
Sadly, my life is not a Christmas movie.
But, that doesn't mean some of the aspects of my Christmas movie are not true. I mean, my family is crazy. I do love them, though. Dearly. I don't try to convert people into loving Christmas, but I don't stop listening to Christmas music if they happen to be in my house or car. Hello! It only happens once a year! I never really understood why Christmas movies (or any movie) needed to have people fall in love in the most random of ways. Do I automatically fall in love after tackling a guy? The answer is no. I do not.
We celebrate the holiday for many reasons, and one of my favorite reasons is because of love. Cheesy, I know.Christmas always has a way of bringing out the best and worst in all of us, but I always remember the best. Eating too much food with my brother, playing cards with my extended family, and yes, we really do sit by a fire. I really wouldn't have it any other way. So maybe my life isn't and won't be a movie/musical, but honestly, who could deal with all that singing anyway? It's exhausting. I'll keep my semi-exciting life and my crazy family. And you, my friends....
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.
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